NURS 445 Week 7 End-of-Life Reflective Paper Example

What I Believe About Death and How It Shapes the Way I Care for the Dying

A First Experience of Death

I was 19 when my grandmother died at home under hospice care. I remember the quiet of the room, the hospice nurse who explained each change in her breathing to us and my grandmother's last clear words, a line from a hymn. I had expected death to be frightening. Instead, it was sad and strangely peaceful. That nurse is part of the reason I became a nurse. I still remember that she spoke to my grandmother by name until the end, even after my grandmother could no longer answer.

What I Believe About Death

I believe that death is real and that it is an enemy. Scripture calls it "the last enemy to be destroyed" (English Standard Version Bible, 2001/2016, 1 Corinthians 15:26), and Jesus wept at the tomb of his friend Lazarus even though he was about to raise him (English Standard Version Bible, 2001/2016, John 11:35). Grief, then, is not a lack of faith. I also believe that death is not the end, because of the resurrection, and that every person, dying or healthy, bears the image of God and deserves dignity to the last breath. These beliefs hold both sorrow and hope, and I think a Christian nurse needs both.

How My Beliefs Have Affected My Care

My beliefs have not always made me a better nurse at the bedside. Two years into practice, I cared for a man dying of lung cancer who was angry and frightened. I found reasons to stay out of his room, giving his medications and leaving quickly. I told myself I was respecting his privacy, but I was avoiding my own discomfort. Kayikci et al. (2026) surveyed nurses in Turkish palliative care units: their fear of death sat at a middle level, yet those who valued spiritual care, had more education or had received end-of-life training held warmer attitudes toward looking after dying patients. Reading that, I recognized that my faith had not removed my anxiety; it had to be joined to training and reflection before it could help me stay in the room.

My beliefs also had to make room for others'. Last year I cared for a dying Muslim woman whose family wanted to turn her bed to face Mecca and recite prayers at her side. I did not share their beliefs, but I realized that believing she was made in God's image meant honoring how she wished to meet death. I helped move the bed and gave the family quiet time. Mauk (2018) emphasizes respecting patients' cultural and spiritual practices at the end of life as part of gerontological nursing, and a JAMA review of the evidence on spirituality in serious illness urged clinicians to make patients' spiritual needs part of routine care (Balboni et al., 2022). Her family thanked me for "letting her die as a Muslim," and I understood that respecting her faith was itself an act of mine.

What I Am Still Learning

One question remains unsettled for me: what to say when a dying patient asks whether I believe they will go to heaven. If the patient shares my faith, I can pray with them and speak of hope. If they do not, or if they are unsure, I am still learning how to respond honestly without either pretending to agree or turning their last days into an argument. For now, my practice is to ask what they believe and what gives them peace, to listen, and, if they want to know my own belief, to share it gently and briefly. I have also learned to call the chaplain sooner, since chaplains are trained for these conversations in a way I am not.

My Commitments

I will carry three commitments into practice. First, I will stay present with dying patients, especially the angry and frightened ones, and notice when I am avoiding a room. Second, I will offer spiritual support, including my own faith when a patient invites it, but I will follow the patient's lead and never impose my beliefs. Third, I will ask every dying patient and family about their beliefs and practices and help them carry them out. My faith gives me hope about death, but my patients need my presence more than they need my theology.

References

Balboni, T. A., VanderWeele, T. J., Doan-Soares, S. D., Long, K. N. G., Ferrell, B. R., Fitchett, G., Koenig, H. G., Bain, P. A., Puchalski, C., Steinhauser, K. E., Sulmasy, D. P., & Koh, H. K. (2022). Spirituality in serious illness and health. JAMA, 328(2), 184-197. https://doi.org/10.1001/jama.2022.11086

English Standard Version Bible. (2016). Crossway. (Original work published 2001)

Kayikci, E. E., Savci, C., Cil Akinci, A., & Dincer, B. (2026). Death anxiety, spiritual care perceptions, and attitudes toward caring for the dying among palliative care nurses. Journal of Hospice and Palliative Nursing, 28(4), E155-E161. https://doi.org/10.1097/NJH.0000000000001200

Mauk, K. L. (Ed.). (2018). Gerontological nursing: Competencies for care (4th ed.). Jones & Bartlett Learning.